Category Archives: relationship astrology

Family Patterns: What’s Your Element?

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Posted by in Astro Lessons, astrology, Astrology and Family, Parental Energies, relationship astrology, The Elements

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By Unknown author – Photo courtesy of the United States Library of Congress’s Prints and Photographs Division under the digital ID ppmsc.06257 {{PD}}

When we consider a return to the family atmosphere (as we do at holidays, or for summer BBQs, to name just two occasions), we may find those gatherings of togetherness and food and sharing inevitably bring us back, to some extent, to our place within that family, with all the feelings, attitudes, closeness, and knee-jerk reactions that go with it. Even the best of relationships can grow strained with time, distance, and conflicting choices. We’re almost sure to both look forward to these reunions (especially after the scourge of Covid) and dread them–at least, we are likely to fear falling back into less-than-positive patterns in interacting with these familiar others, adding to the stresses already extant in our grown-up, everyday lives.

One thing that can help immensely is determining what element dominates within the family, and whether that is your dominant vibe. Sorting this out can explain on what level and through what mechanism (mental, emotional, action-oriented, material) the family is operating (in the Collective sense), and if this is the element through which we are most likely to channel our responses. At its simplest, this is a very straightforward process: draw a ‘family tree’ (or your own version of one) and list the Sun sign and its element for each individual. I can (almost) guarantee you’ll immediately begin to see correspondences, connections in behaviors, the grouping together of some individuals in social settings while others retreat to a lone ‘branch’–and you’ll have the beginnings of where you fit in the mix.

Though, as we know, Sun sign astrology doesn’t provide many answers by itself, we must in this case acknowledge that the Soul (Sun) element is a vital part of the individual’s unique expression; nobody is alienated from their own Soul (no matter how it may appear from the outside!) so when we look at the Sun’s element, we are looking at a crucial vibrational chord for the individual. No matter what else we have in our charts, we respond to that Soul element.

Naturally, the more detailed we can be in our assessment, the more we will be able to draw connections and understand interactions. If we know the Moon and/ or rising sign of the individual, or if we have access to the whole horoscope and can determine the overall dominant element, even better. In particular, the Moon will help us see those close connections that may not be explained with Sun sign elements. For example, I was very close to my maternal grandmother, whose Sun element is Water; mine is Air. Those would seem to ‘talk’ past each other, except that my Moon is in Water–I could empathize and relate to her need to see the world (in essence) through the emotions, even though my predominant viewpoint is a mental one, and she could relate to me, through her Air Moon, making for a kind of personal ‘mutual reception’ that balances shared elements between individuals. We often thought and felt remarkably alike; and this was in contrast to her daughter, my mother, whose Fire Sun and Moon often left us completely in the dark as to her thought processes and her motivations, a double Fire, ‘leap without looking’ approach.

It also helps, though, to consider the Earth sign of the individual (always found exactly opposite the Sun). For example, in the case of relating to my mother, it is possible for me to relate by light conversation, using wit and verbal sparring to find out what she thinks and feels, as her Earth is in Gemini Air; the fact that the body involved is Earth suggests that the conversation must focus on material matters, or at least start out there–then she will open up to relating, to exchanging information. Of course, the more you know about a person’s chart, the easier it is to see why they do or don’t blend with others in a group.

Let’s take a look at a family like any other, the Royal family of England. Specifically, let’s look at how the ladies who’ve married into the family have fit in, or failed to. HRH Elizabeth II (21 April 1926 2:40 AM London United Kingdom) has the Sun at 00 Taurus (some call this ‘the Hitler degree’, as it was also Hitler’s Solar placement, but I find that a little harsh)–so an individual who sets a grounded tone in the family; you’d probably do best to chat about her dogs or hunting or her castles, as finding common points of reference and common comforts and values are the way to relate. Son Charles (14 November 1948 9:14 PM London UK) has Sun in Scorpio–he’s a feeler!–but Earth in Mom’s Sun sign of Taurus–so they relate easily, especially through material matters, and Mom’s Water Earth sign reciprocates–and bonus! Charles’ Moon is exactly conjunct Mommy’s Sun (not an especially unusual parent/ child contact)–so there’s a lot of harmony there, with Charles for the most part bowing to his mother’s preferences–though when feeling triumphs it really triumphs, the case in point being his marriage to Camilla (17 July 1947 7:10 AM  London UK). Her Water Sun and Moon fit in with her husband’s temperament well and relate to the Queen through material commonalities (Camilla’s Earth in Earth! Perhaps representing that Camilla’s family is of the same milieu as the queen’s). Her Water-Earth Sun-Earth combo relates well to her husband through shared feeling about material matters, as well as the strong feeling nature. But what about his ‘old’ wife?

Diana Spencer (1 July 1961 7:45 PM  Sandringham UK) has what should be a very sympathetic placement of Sun in Water, Earth in Earth–so what made for such discord and alienation between herself and the family she entered through marriage? Probably that Aquarian Air Moon of hers. It may have required things make sense, be explained, and be subjected to logic and intellectual examination–not to mention taking her vows quite seriously, at least until she found she’d been deceived by her husband, who never stopped seeing old flame Camilla. The need for ‘shared Air’ may have driven Diana from the family; it could’ve felt like no one spoke of anything important, that information was never really shared–is that really surprising, from a family that lives in a series of castles, who have feelings deeper for their corgis (or at least seemed to, from Diana’s point of view) than what they felt for a woman who essentially just needed to relate?

Charles and Diana’s son William (21 June 1982  9:03 PM Paddington UK) was born in the lee of a partial Solar eclipse, while wife Kate was born on the same day as a total Lunar eclipse (9 January 1982 ntk Reading UK). Weird, no? There may be an implied energy balance of extraordinary extremes in the pairing of these two–William’s dual Water Sun-Moon and Earth in Earth fits the family dynamic neatly (and his 00 Sun placement may sympathize with grandma’s 00 Sun energy), and Kate does, too, with Sun in Earth and Moon-Earth in Water. She may come across as super-practical, and on the inside could be a little more sensitive than other family members, but likely doesn’t let that show except to her husband–who has the freedom of those born into an extraordinary situation to be a little looser in expression and choice. These two fit into the current Royal family like hands in gloves–but as we’ve seen lately, his brother and his spouse haven’t.

Prince Harry (15 September 1984 4:20 PM Paddington UK) has Sun in Earth, Earth in Water–so he should fit in well, right? His Moon in Earth only reinforces this. The answer to Harry’s recent defection might lie in other areas, which I’ll note later–but we have been presented with the family’s treatment of his American wife as the reason, so we need to look there, at least for the trigger to Harry’s leave-taking. Meghan Markle (4 August 1981 4:46 AM Canoga Park California USA) has a Fire Sun and an Air Earth. Uh-oh–she tires them out, agitating for clarity, and probably for due respect (that Fire is Leo, after all!) Meghan’s Earth in Air echoes Diana’s Moon, probably stirring up fears in Harry that his wife may suffer the same hounding and ill-fate his mother did. So, we have our trigger–but is that enough to make Harry dump the institution, and consequently his family, since they can’t seem to see themselves as separate from it?

Though there are many interesting ties between Harry and Meghan, I’m going to point to only two that I think tell the story: Her Chiron conjoined his Moon, and his Sun square her Neptune. She may stir emotional feelings and fears he didn’t even know he had, and she may register to him as ideal (as a media star, the epitome of a particular shad of Neptune) but the dream she represents may present difficult circumstances, challenges to overcome (the square) that speak directly to who he is (Sun). Add to this in Harry’s own chart that his Sun is closely conjoined Zeus, melding his Beingness with his ambitions and desires–and can you imagine a more unfortunate placement for someone who, before William had children, was considered the ‘spare’ to William’s ‘heir’? Leaving may have been the only way for that Sun to fulfill itself–and certainly, he’d already distinguished himself in the military, and in creating the Invictus games, taking a special interest in those wounded in war, just as his mother similarly did in her crusade against landmines. Add to this his Nodal axis at 29 degrees, suggesting pressure, a do-or-die need for fulfillment in the life direction, and he may have felt a kind of unfocused urgency to create an exceptional life–and after a point, leaving the family may have seemed the only way to do it.

Some things to consider: those we are related to, those with whom we’ve grown up, and/ or those with whom we feel ‘obligated’ to share holidays or to gather with for larger reasons may not necessarily need to be a part of our current lives, especially if we associate significant pain with this individual or group. Though we may have quite an internal conflict over the appropriateness of spending the holidays at a distance from some we would normally include, our primary duty is to look out for our own health and well-being. The truth is we can hardly be kind to others if we mistreat ourselves.

A Brief Guide to Families by Element

Some of this might seem a little obvious, and of course there will be variations–I didn’t get into the sub-groups, where a family has a main element and a secondary one, or where there are splinter groups within the larger groups that carry their own elemental themes–but I think you can see where I’m going, and can figure this kind of thing out. It often jumps out as we outline our family tree, revealing alliances we always knew were there, somehow, but hadn’t really consciously acknowledged.

Water families communicate through feelings–and everything, even those things that seem to be material (like gifts) or cut-and-dried (like contracts or wills) are driven by emotion. Water families are often emoters and everything is expressed to extremes–and they’re also the group most likely to punctuate gatherings with fights, swearing, accusations, and copious numbers of tears. They’re as well the group that opens their get-togethers to strangers most easily, who are warmest and most demonstrative, and who may be very uncomfortable if you’re not letting every feeling show, too.

Fire families are just that, full of fire, which means they’re assigning tasks, organizing games, playing sports, or running errands non-stop. All this fosters lots of interaction but with little depth; it’s a matter of each group member doing doing doing beside the others, so engagement is on the surface or minimal. That’s the way they like it, though; to them sitting for hours around the table chatting or watching the snow fall is pointless. This group loves to include anyone who’s a good sport and willing to get their hands dirty; balk at their tasks and you might be seen as ‘being mopey’.

Earth families are all about comfort, and making everyone feel secure; they find fast movement risky, too much talk distracting, and crying a sign of emergency. The stars of this family are the carpenters, cooks, craftspeople, and anyone who offers physical comfort through skill or effort. Their all is aimed toward creating a cozy environment, seeing to plenty of sustenance, and a satisfying material experience–which can be lovely if your idea of a great holiday is to wrap yourself in a ham cocoon in front of the fire, but most of the non-Earth oriented may find the low level of interaction or exercise frustrating, especially as any expression of dissatisfaction is likely to be met with an offer of warm slippers, cocoa, and a big, crush-the-unhappy-out-of-you hug.

Air families communicate endlessly–everything means something, has a message, must be discussed, and is in danger of being misunderstood. For all their emphasis on mental exchange they can be terrible listeners; but they do think about what might make everyone happy, and in that way they can be the most accommodating of the groups, as long as they can relate to what someone else might need. The stars of this family are the witty and the intelligent, the co-operative and the artistic. Words are the currency in this group, followed by expressions of ‘thoughtfulness’, and because there’s so much attention to communication they can be uneven in departments like decorating, activities, or buying enough food–because who’s counting portions when you’re thinking of all the stories you’ll tell at the dinner table?

This work first appeared in ECLIPSE, and has been edited, and modified with the addition of the material on Prince Harry and Meghan.

Receptivity and Desire: The Great Attractors in the Natal Chart Venus, Chiron, and the Moon

05 Wednesday Sep 2018

Posted by in Aspect Delineation, astrology, Astrology of Careers Vocations and Callings, relationship astrology

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Attraction is not just a relaxing of our out-thrusting energies, it’s a state of receptivity. By Joseph-Désiré Court 1828 {{PD}}

A reprint from a January 2013 issue of ECLIPSE:

We typically think that we must, in some form, assert ourselves in order to get what we want out of life: we set ourselves on a Path, think of ourselves as seekers, and actively look for those things we imagine will bring us satisfaction. Rarely do we sit back and allow the Universe to handle the timing; letting what we want come to us is in many ways a foreign concept, especially to the Western-educated mind. But, it’s one I’d like you to entertain, at least temporarily, as we pinpoint some components of the natal chart that promise the possibility of having the Universe serve up our desires, rather than of us having to pursue them–I’m calling them ‘The Great Attractors’.

We have a literal astronomical example in the area of 14 degrees 2 minutes Sagittarius, termed ‘The Great Attractor’. This area is described by astrophysicists as a mass concentration of what is assumed to be dark matter that exerts a gravitational pull on all objects in our region, creating a ‘flow’ in the direction of the constellation Centaurus. The Milky Way (our home) and other nearby galaxies (like Andromeda) are being inexorably pulled in this direction, yet we can’t see what’s pulling us, because the Attractor is hidden by the plane of our galaxy; in other words, our own stardust and matter obscures our view of what’s causing our movement through the Universe. The physical world acts this way in relation to the spirit: the issues we encounter with the material often obscure our spiritual Beingness, our intent. The pull of the Great Attractor is very much how the energies described by the horoscope act within us: they pull us, unseen, in particular directions, the inclinations, talents, and preferences they detail giving us our impetus in specific areas of life and setting us on a unique trajectory, one on which no one has ever traveled in quite this way before. (And just in case there’s any confusion, no, I don’t think the planets actually exert an influence on us–but I do think the planets reflect energies within us, and so act as a kind of ‘shadow play’ we are able to interpret with astrology).

Though we are always attracting things and people and events into our lives, to shift to a conscious mode of engagement with the Universe is to take an enormous step forward in consciousness; the more aware we become of unconscious material, the more ‘in control’ (if there is such a thing) we can be of the manifestations, outcomes, and developments in our lives. Of course, becoming highly conscious doesn’t mean we ‘out’ all unconscious material (after all, we have a 12th House, and it doesn’t disappear upon enlightenment!)–it simply means that we have the best chance of understanding our own energies, and our own intentions, and so in producing and/ or attracting circumstances that we actually want, at least most of the time.

Venus shows us our desire nature, not so much in that lusty, material world way of Zeus (though there is an element of this to Venus, with her concentration on assets and beauty, and her propensity for envy, jealousy, and even greed), but in a way that describes what makes us feel loved, what makes us feel worthy. She by House, aspects, and sign placement tells us what we enjoy, what we want in relationship, what we see as worth earning, what we see as valuable, and what we find seductive. Venus, in a very real sense, describes what attracts us, but also tells what is attracted to us, and so serves to describe our primary attractive energy. The element in which our Venus plays natally gives us a big clue as to what we must initiate in order to prompt the attractive energy: in Earth, material things aligned with our Venus nature (described by the sign) are involved in attracting; with Fire it’s actions or events; with Water, memorable emotional ‘occasions’, feelings, or intuitions; and in Air ideas, thoughts, and communications given and received are energized. This doesn’t mean, for instance, that if we have Venus in Leo (Fire) we can’t gain materially (Earth); it means instead that a great attraction begins with a Fire event. With Venus in a Fire sign, we must act, in order to initiate our attractive ability. It’s true that the attractive energy happens no matter what we do, it’s just that to make the most of it, we should be receptive in the way it describes, in the case of Venus in Leo, opening ourselves to receive by acting.

And what are we pulling in, should we be operating unconsciously? We will attract element-related happenings in the life that are meant to trigger our Venus into conscious use. We may have the experience with a Venus in Libra, for instance, of hearing talk (Libra is an Air sign) that we find unflattering, which prompts us to change our relationship interactions (Venus in Libra) to be more pleasant, more balanced, or perhaps more loving to ‘the Other’–we become conscious of the need for change, so that the energies we’re attracting are harmonious to our natal energies.

Using our Venus consciously means we open to the entire spectrum of what Venus indicates; we open to accepting/ attracting money, love, relationships, assets, the appropriate aesthetic environment, companions, a harmonious material environment within which to express, and to living our values when we utilize our Venus attractive properties as they are keyed to us in the natal chart. We must be relaxed, aware of, and especially accepting of our Venusian components as accurate representations of what we desire. This can be challenging for some, who may de-value their Venus (those who eschew money or whatever ‘currency’ is in use in their world as unspiritual, for example, or those who believe that aesthetics are extraneous–“As long as it works, what’s the difference?”–or those who “Go it alone”, finding relationships draining or bothersome, to cite a few possibilities). We must be comfortable with our own Venus energy; in this case, we must be accepting of and even, in a sense, immersed in our Venus, in order to exert that attractive ‘force’.

We have another Great Attractor in the chart in the form of Chiron. The asteroid of the primal wound, healing, and the skills unique to the individual (skills that I believe were unavailable to personal use until last year; that’s the 2012 ‘shift’, in my opinion, as outlined in the supplement ‘The Elevation of Chiron 2012’) acts very much like the astronomical Great Attractor: it pulls things in, but we don’t have the perspective to recognize what is causing the gravitational force! In Chiron’s case, the wound acts as a psychological ‘black hole’, until we excavate and both uncover our hurt and begin to heal it. Our Chiron, then, will attract to us situations that irritate and stimulate the wound–until we make it conscious. Once we do, it’s like gaining a Super Power: we become impervious to the previous wound, as we can look back on our hurt, understand it, but no longer react to it. As well, we carry a special empathy for those suffering similar wounds; we can in fact recognize these individuals immediately. Once healed, our Chiron still functions as an Attractor, through use of our Chirotic skills; we use them, and send a wave out into the Universe that says: I have this to offer, I’m ready to employ it, and the Universe answers with opportunities, often taken to a Transpersonal level (discussed in ‘Chiron in the Natal Chart’). Often contact from something in someone else’s chart will cause us to either cast them as Wounder (no matter what the reality) or as Healer–and of course, that puts a lot of pressure on any relationship.

We have one other major receptive/ attractive energy in the natal chart, the Moon. Luna represents the ultimate receptive energy; this is the part of us that’s made to absorb, receive, and take in–and so is incredibly vulnerable. It seems to me that the Moon bounces its reflected light out into the Universe indiscriminately, and for the individual this translates as a kind of emotional ‘light’, an aura, of emotional and psychic energy that acts like a beacon, reaching out and meeting the reflected emotional light of others–I think in large part this is how we recognize those who are like us, who welcome us, through a combination of the Moon’s emotional light and the vibratory rate at which this exists. We’ve all had the experience of meeting people who live at a different emotional rate than we do–we don’t feel at home with them, and they don’t feel at home with us. We seek those with whom we feel comfortable, who will offer us comfort by their mere presence–and this is the Moon.

The Moon describes our emotional outlook, our means of processing via feeling, and our intuitive ‘feelers’, with the sign telling us in what form the intuition is likely to be picked up. For the Moon in Taurus, for example, material situations and environments will convey unspoken, intangible information; for a Moon in Scorpio, emotional undercurrents in situations and with individuals will be the most likely conveyor of info; while for a Moon in Aquarius it comes by ‘reading between the lines’, and by processing what is heard and observed in unusual ways. With any Moon sign openness to the energies and perceptive ways of the opposing sign will also figure in; for instance, the Aries Moon, which typically sense through the Self in relationship to others and through action (acting and then, often simultaneously sensing relevant data), may receive intuitive ‘bursts’ in the manner of Moon in Libra, which come through sensing relationships, through aesthetic considerations, and through putting out strong ‘feelers’ into the world. In this example, Aries senses through attunement to the Self while Libra senses by attunement to the Other; all signs can work in this fashion, utilizing the complementary energies of the opposing sign. For instance, Taurus senses through the material and the environment, while Scorpio senses through all that’s unseen or hidden, through what’s purely felt. This sensing mechanism is the conduit by which we not only understand through emotion/ feeling, but attract things, largely by ‘matching’ vibrational levels of the Self to vibrational levels of objects, persons, and places.

Beethoven in 1815, By Joseph Willibrord Mähler {{PD}}

Attractor Interplay: Beethoven and Therese Malfatti

Though composer Ludwig van Beethoven (16 December 1770 3:40 AM Bonn, Germany) never married, there was a point when he thought he’d found ‘the One’ in one of his students, Therese Malfatti (1 January 1792 ntk Vienna Austria). At the time of their meeting Beethoven was 40 and Therese 18. Beethoven had many previous romantic relationships, and none of them resulted in marriage, most likely because Beethoven liked to date the noblewomen who took music lessons with him, whose male relatives were often patrons of Beethoven, or who were music patrons themselves–and though he was an acknowledged genius in his field within his lifetime, no one from the upper classes wanted to marry someone with financial troubles and no connections. With Therese, Beethoven was so sure of his own feelings, and sure that she reciprocated, that he wrote a friend in Bonn to obtain his birth certificate, which was needed to marry. In actuality, Therese was an accomplished musician in her own right, but she didn’t confuse admiration for her mentor/ teacher with love. Beethoven misunderstood her affection and wanted the relationship to go forward–with interesting results.

Therese Malfatti, from an anonymous pastel painting in the Beethoven house, Bonn {{PD}}

In 1810, Beethoven was invited to a party at the Malfatti home, where he intended to play a song he’d written just for Therese (Bagatelle Wo059) and then propose marriage, but he became so drunk he didn’t play and didn’t propose; all he was able to do was scrawl across the top of the music manuscript ‘Für Therese’. If Beethoven did ever propose to Therese, he was turned down; she married a Hungarian Count in 1816. The bagatelle was unearthed upon Therese’s death in 1851, and published, but Beethoven’s drunken scrawl was nearly illegible. The title was mis-read as ‘Für Elise’ and this piece, which may be one of the most famous compositions in the world, is still called by its misinterpreted label.

When we look at the cross-chart interplay involving the Attractor/ Receptors of Venus, Chiron, and the Moon in the charts of Beethoven and Therese, we may note that other contacts had a strong role in the proceedings, including her Uranus conjunct his Midheaven-Saturn and her Pluto opposed it (he felt exceptionally unique around her, saw her as modern and inventive, intelligent, and sexy! and that all of this reflected well on his career and public reputation); her Sun sits at the rough midpoint of his Jupiter-Pluto conjunction (again with the sexy! and her ability to ‘shine’ on his public role); and her Ceres conjuncts his Mars and opposes his Pallas-Mercury-Ceres (she may have felt like a force of nature to him, stirring up his manhood! and perhaps making him feel that her presence enhanced his ability to communicate wisely); and some strong Saturn contacts probably made it feel to him that this was a permanent thing (their Saturns are trine, though his makes more contact to her planets that hers to his).

Beethoven’s Sagittarius Moon is conjunct his Ceres and trine her Saturn and possibly her Aries Moon–her Saturn (respect for authority and experience, need for security) responded to his emotional overtures, though on his part it may have felt like she was suppressing his intuitive pull toward her. His Moon-Ceres also opposes her Ceres, suggesting a compelling dynamic involving talk/ communion/ and knowledge exchange (Gemini/ Sagittarius) which may have been stimulating for him (Fire on his side) but draining for her (with Ceres in Gemini Air).

The composer’s Capricorn Venus is in an out-of-sign conjunction with her Aquarian Mercury –this suggests to me that there may have been a feeling of appreciating the same things, when in fact they did not–and his Venus snuggles in to her Grand Square/ Cross which involves her Merc-his Venus, her Jupiter-Neptune (plus his Vesta) opposed her Pallas, plus her Vesta in Leo as final point in the configuration. This may have felt to her as if his Venusian need, his appetites, were intruding on her ideal social role, her highest values, her communications, and what she considers wise–he may have felt to her just a wee bit like a social climber–and we’ve already seen how much he thought his social standing would benefit from an alliance.

Her Venus sextiles his Venus and semi-sextiles his Sun while also quincunxing his Mars-Earth. This set of contacts may have felt to her rewarding, in that she could feel his appreciation of her, yet the quincunx likely felt like she just couldn’t be attracted to him–not without him being more ‘manly’ and perhaps having more assets. Her Mars trines his Venus–uh-oh. This is one of the most consistent indicators in my experience for a relationship that will not last; the gender switch of basic energies always seems to create unease in both parties, and inevitably, she is too assertive, and he too soft in some way, for the two to stay together.

Her Chiron sits at the midpoint of his trine of Juno-Neptune to Uranus; this may have signaled her that to be his wife (Juno) would have meant being surpassed in importance by both his uniqueness as an individual and by his creativity, his music–and surely this would wound. Her Chiron also opposed his Pluto, suggesting his sexuality, as well as his well-documented temper, may have made her uncomfortable and perhaps even repelled her, and his Chiron, conjunct his 29 degree Zeus, doesn’t require contact to her chart to draw a picture of how passionate and ambition-obsessed Beethoven may have been, though it does exactly trine her Venus, implying she would very likely have been sacrificed on the altar of his desires–in the end, not a pretty picture, a scenario of something other than a lasting, equitable relationship.

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Why Are They Together? Bill and Hillary

31 Sunday Jan 2016

Posted by in relationship astrology

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Bill and Hillary Clinton Natal Wheel

Here’s a reprint from 2008, for the curious and the bemused, on this lazy Sunday:

Sometimes the attraction between partners is lost to onlookers. No other modern couple has caused the puzzled scrutiny and armchair analysis of their relationship more than Hillary Rodham and Bill Clinton; now I’ll add my astrological take on the ‘whys’ of their relationship, using techniques featured in my book, THE ASTROLOGY OF INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP. There’s just not room here to do an exhaustive dissection of the relationship astrologically, but in any case I find that’s rarely needed; not to shortchange any relationship on its complex nature, but the interaction between two individuals can typically be outlined fairly with a few strokes, and there are always a small handful of contacts that describe the relationship’s essence, and thus satisfy our goal without getting lost in minutiae. Conjunctions often spell out the core of the interaction, and in significant relationships there’s usually no shortage of these.

In many ways, the ‘star’ of this relationship in terms of attraction is the meeting of his 1st House Venus to her 12th House Neptune.  Venus in a man’s chart shows his ‘ideal partner,’ and in Bill’s case this is someone who probably literally embodies his anima (1st House placement); posited in Libra, his desire is for someone gracious, partnership oriented, and lovely as seen through his eyes, and conjoined Hillary’s Neptune, this may be precisely what he sees. In what’s likely a combination of projection of his Venus and the naturally obscuring and inspiring qualities imparted by contact with another’s Neptune, Bill may be genuinely confused by the polarized reactions others have to his wife. In the other direction, she may find his anima expresses certain more Universal qualities for her; he may carry to some extent her more empathetic qualities. He feels (and perhaps expresses) her pain, as well as that of the Collective.

Her Sun at 2 Scorpio is widely conjoined his Libra Juno, again referencing the strength of the Venus connection, as he will see Libran energy as ‘wifely.’ With this contact her very Soul essence expresses not just this ‘wifely’ role to him, but the power of the Scorpio placement is supported by him; he expects her to show a strong, empowered Self. What’s more, her Juno at 29 Sag (and we know what those 29 degree placements mean–they must express!) is conjunct his Pallas–he sees her as highly empowered and his own role as lending wisdom and skill to this.

His Earth conjoins her Pallas, suggesting that he grounds and supports materially the expression of her innate wisdom and skills. His Ceres squares her Sun, likely allowing her to carry his anima authority figure (though not without some conflict between them)–he may feel she’s something of a force of nature! And her Fire Jupiter fills in a Fire Grand Trine cross-chart with his Saturn and Vesta, painting a dynamic picture of real-world service to the social sphere as important to them both.

Bill’s Sun falls in Hillary’s 10th, conjoined her Zeus and Saturn–not the most romantic of placements, but she may feel she has a true supporter in him, and that her ambitions can be fulfilled through him, while her Sun falls in his 2nd–considering some of the already discussed contacts, he may identify with her, especially with her talents, very strongly–something that would probably surprise a great many people.

His Sun is conjoined her Saturn, a bit of a danger position. Even though strong, direct Saturn contacts in both directions (each person’s Saturn contacting something of the other person’s) are necessary for a relationship to be both lasting and serious, this is one of the tougher interactions, as she will spontaneously, and almost in spite of conscious feeling desire to repress his very essence (the Sun). He will sense this, and, considering the other contacts, will both remain in the relationship and seek to avoid her control at every turn; with his Saturn square her Sun, however, he may do the same to her, but more obliquely (square) likely through methods of open conflict.

Finally, we should backtrack a bit and look at general partner preferences for each. We’ve talked about Bill’s Venus, but what about Hillary’s? It sits in Scorpio; ‘ideal Hillary’ would have all the sexy, mysterious, stinging Scorpio attributes. Her ideal partner would have Leonine qualities, as shown by her Mars in Leo, and Bill has five placements there, including the Sun. As to his ideal view of himself, his Mars is in Libra, again aiming for partner-oriented, gracious, and sharing qualities with an aesthetic bent, just like his ideal woman.

We could go on with many more features, but I’ll close with this: her Ascendant squares his Sun-Zeus. This suggests that her personality rubs him the wrong way, at least in terms of what he believes will fulfill his Soul intent, ambitions, and desires; but her Midheaven, Saturn, and Zeus are widely conjoined that Sun-Zeus, suggesting her public persona, her sense of restraint and stability, and her ambitions complement his and help fulfill his wants. His Midheaven to her Vertex only reinforces the ‘destined’ feeling. No interaction is without its negatives, but when the aspirations of each individual connect so cleanly, they can remain together in spite of events that would break others apart.

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The Mother of Them All

10 Sunday May 2015

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Here’s a Mother’s Day re-print, y’all! Happy Mother’s Day!

I really think there are many more maternal figures since Medea lost it who are worse than our subject; but it’s undeniable that her name has become a catchphrase for over-the-top histrionics and abuse (as well as the scourge of dry cleaners, through the admonition, “No! Wire! Hangars!”) Yes, I’m talking about the much maligned, and now nearly iconic symbol of dysfunctional mothering, actress and one-time Pepsico CEO Joan Crawford (23 March 1903, 10:00 PM, San Antonio Texas). To be fair to Joan, after a brief perusal of the mothering related factors in her chart, we’ll look at the chart of the adopted daughter who brought Joan’s alleged behavior to light, Christina Crawford (11 June 1939, 3:00 PM, Los Angeles California).

The attitude toward children in general, and one’s children in particular, is found in the 5th; for the senior Ms. Crawford, this is ruled by Neptune, alerting us immediately to the possibility that this woman does not see children in a realistic light. Neptune is in the 8th at 00 Cancer, implying that she may see children as a resource (something she was indeed accused of, in the sense of using her adopted children as props and a PR ploy), with the 00 placement in Cancer pointing up the emotional newness, even rawness, of Neptune related subjects–interesting in light of her lifelong occupation of film acting, with the 8th placement suggesting that she may have easily gained the support of others in this.

Neptune ruler, and symbol of both the mothering Joan received herself, and the attitude she carried toward mothering in general, the Moon, sits in Aquarius less than one degree from conjunction with Saturn, both in the 3rd. This is a combination for emotional repression, even coldness, as the emotions are processed intellectually; sitting in the 3rd this emphasized the mental approach to emotions, and this was communicated, whether she wanted others to see it or not. The Moon also trines Mars and Earth in Libra, marrying the emotions almost too easily to the material and to the ego and aggressive/ assertive urges, and the Moon sextiles Vesta and the Sun in Aries, making emotional challenges seem like ones that threaten her very identity, and giving the emotional scenario a label of ‘sacred’–no one may contradict her emotional interpretation! The Moon also sextiles Juno in the 1st, making her Self empowered through emotional expression. So, though the emotions are directly suppressed, we see they have plenty of real-world outlets, along with many underlying assumptions about their sacrosanct nature.

Mars, ruler of the Sun and already part of the equation through contact with the Moon, rules the 6th of duty and everyday happenings/ routine, and holds Venus in Aries, valuing the martial spirit and the kind of strict, military style routines her adoptive daughter said were a household staple. Chiron, which can often show a wound that drives much of our compulsive behavior, is isolated in Capricorn at the bottom of the chart, suggesting attempts to stave off the wound and attendant bad feelings about the Self may have taken the form of extreme discipline and repression. Chiron sits at the midpoint of a square between Juno (Self-empowerment) and Jupiter (society), implying she might have seen these two interests as in conflict, setting up a ‘Joan vs. everyone else’ dynamic.

But does she really fit the model of a ‘devouring mother’? Pluto is essential to that picture, and in Joan Crawford’s chart it is chart ruler, posited in the 8th, opposes Uranus, ruler of the 4th, and square Piscean Mercury, which brings us back to Neptune. This suggests that she may have been tempted to destroy the very people and things that supported her, that she may have been in an internal death struggle with her own expression of individuality and a longing to be part of the group, and that she was as likely to communicate destructively as she was to communicate in a way that reflected her (somewhat disconnected from reality–see Neptune’s situation) ideals. Though she certainly qualifies as responding to the devouring Archetype, she seems more a figure to be pitied than condemned; the emotional dysfunctions and woundedness that drove her were not easily dealt with, even for someone Self-aware. Ms. Crawford seems to have been unwilling, and perhaps even unable, to recognize her own distorted nature.

Adopted daughter Christina (11 June 1939, 3:00 PM, Los Angeles California) may have had her own motivations (aside from just revealing events) in writing her tell-all book, ‘Mommie Dearest.’ The view of the mother is found in the 10th, and the experience of mothering received in the state of the Moon. Leo is on the 10th cusp, with ruler Sun in the 8th in Gemini and conjunct Mercury. The Sun is sesquiquadrate Mars in Aquarius at the bottom of the chart–it just happens to conjunct Joan’s Moon. Where else would Christina’s ego and aggressive urges, intellectualtized and hidden deep inside herself, go for outlet, but to Mommie? Her Moon is in Aries (ruled by the instrument of her ego/ anger/ assertion); the Moon rules the 9th of publishing, and is square Chiron (the primal wound) in Cancer (Mom again!) and is conjunct Jupiter, which rules the intercepted 2nd, suggesting that perhaps there was a deeply hidden idea of the Self as ‘big’ and in connection to the other energies may have felt the only way to express this ‘bigness’ was through the emotions (Moon/ Jupiter conjunct).

Of course, just because someone has Jupiter connected to the 2nd, it doesn’t mean they have an inflated Self-worth; but I do remember distinctly that the book featured many episodes where Christina asserted her talents failed to be recognized. I recall wondering what talents and abilities she repeatedly referred to in the abstract, as she seemed to take for granted that the reader assumed her to be almost magically accomplished and talented, though she made virtually no direct reference to exactly what those talents were. 5th House (creativity) Jupiter happens to be, among other salient aspects, trine Pluto, implying a syndrome I’ve seen at work before (and first saw mentioned in the work of the great Grant Lewi): frustrated individuals with Jupiter/ Pluto aspects often believe they possess a whole list of imaginary attributes; the unfortunate part is that they judge themselves on these, and miss connecting with their real talents, and thus short-circuit their opportunities in reality. I believe this particular kind of magical thinking was at work in Christina. Also of note: her Aries Moon is conjunct Joan’s Sun. Reincarnationists will of course enjoy that; I’ll just say that this speaks of the child’s emotional state (and needs) meeting the ego/ identity/ Soul of the mother, head on; could it have felt to both like there was competition for recognition of each of these needs/ energies in the other? Even looking at only the couple of contacts between these two charts we’ve mentioned (Mars/ Moon, Moon/ Sun), we can see that, no matter how Christina was treated, she likely would have seen Joan as trying to outshine her, and perhaps, in disowning her own aggression, Christina more than a little contributed to the situation that came about; even children have the full pallet of urges and attributes–when we forget that, we infantilize (and fail to respect) them, and put our ability to have a fulfilling relationship with them in peril.

What You’re Asking: the Romance edition

14 Saturday Feb 2015

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Dear Reader: Here’s a romance-themed re-print from 2009, for Valentine’s Day–Have a Happy One! jd

What’s the synastry of Chiron conjunct Juno cross-chart?

Here it’s very important to know who has the Juno, a male or a female–but since we don’t know, what we can say is that there may be some form of power struggle centered in one or both parties’ personal sense of empowerment in life. This may come in a wound v. authority conflict, or could center in a knowledge v. privilege stand-off. If the Juno is a woman’s, we may see her empowerment come about through the skill or aid of the Chiron person, whether this is a male or female; this individual might in a very real way ‘heal’ this woman’s sense of empowerment and Self-authority. This same person might also ultimately wound the Juno woman, as either he or she ‘acts out’ through the wounded nature whenever the woman seeks empowerment, or could feel wounded themselves by the woman’s empowerment stance. There is also a worst case scenario where the Chiron person (male or female) clashes badly with a Juno female in the most emotionally spiteful way possible; with the deep wound of Chiron activated and focused on and engaged with the vengeful side of Juno, this could be one very negative combination. If the Juno belongs to a male, we may see his idea of the ‘perfect partner’ activate the primal wound in the other person–this is a very toxic and probably insurmountable (as well as sad) potential reaction. On the positive side, the Juno male might, through his admiration and the sense of a ‘perfect fit’ somehow, bring forward the other individual’s unique Chirotic skill–no small feat, and again creating an unusual ‘trigger’ situation that can be highly significant in a relatively exaggerated positive or negative sense, depending on the situation.

Fantagraphics Books 2004, John Benson, editor

Fantagraphics Books 2004, John Benson, editor

Can a Capricorn woman and an Aquarius man find happiness?

As frequent readers of my blogs probably know, I’m no fan of sun-sign astrology, simply because, well, astrology’s just not that simple! We can venture a few guesses about this pairing, though, based on some ‘probablys.’ First, though adjacent signs typically do not make for good playmates, there are exceptions depending both on situation and which signs are involved, and this is one of those (possible) exceptions: since Capricorn and Aquarius share an ancient (at least, pre-outer planets discovery) ruler, Saturn, then we have an avenue for compatibility in energies that, at least in modern definition, contrast. Normally, the energy of each sign can be seen as a kind of reaction to the one it follows; in this case, Aquarius ‘reacts’ with an emphasis on anarchy, intellect, and modernism, to Capricorn’s emphasis on rules, the material, and tradition. But, since they share an ancient ruler, we must look for the commonalities, such as the discipline that intellectual achievement demands, and the need for the avant garde and innovative to have a past and tradition upon which to base their ‘newness.’ So, we may find that surface clash is really just that with this pair, surface, and that the underlying attitudes may be very much alike.

There is also the idea that, since energies that travel in proximity to the Sun (Mercury and Venus) are typically, if not in the same sign as the Sun, then in the sign on either side of it, this gives potential other personal avenues (through communication styles, aesthetics, values, and attitudes toward love, money, and relationship) for likeness in expression.

We could look at this combo through the elements, too: Air and Earth together could kick up a lot of dust, even a tornado of energy, or the two might never mix, leaving a static horizon with nary a breeze between them.

In any event, good luck, Cappy and Aqua–and for a truly meaningful and complete synastric comparison, consult an astrologer.

How do I seduce a woman with Venus in Aries?

Very carefully! Just kidding–though it never hurts to approach the Warrior Venus with respect. Keep in mind, Venus in a woman’s chart represents her ‘ideal Self,’ as well as telling us of her attitudes toward love, money, values, and aesthetics, so we’re really talking about appealing to her as she likes to see herself. For anyone, reflecting back to them the image they most want to have can leave them totally charmed; after all, who wouldn’t respond positively when someone is not only interested in them, but sees them as they imagine themselves in their very best form.

Aries Venus wants to be seen as strong, as offering some form of leadership (and this can be in a fashion, beauty, or aesthetic sense, as well as overt command), and definitely wants to be seen as  her own woman, significant in her own right, entirely Self-determining. Treat her like she knows what she’s doing–she’ll love you for it.

Should I swear at an Aries man?

The question is, should you swear at anybody? I don’t think a Sun sign really comes into it–but if you must swear at a man, Aries not only can take it, he may be just a little turned on by such a fiery display. Tread with care, however–simple human decency suggests that you might do best to show the attitude but hold back on the more graphic accompaniments.

Your ECLIPSE Weekend Sampler 30-31 August 2014: Don’t Abdicate

30 Saturday Aug 2014

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Don't abdicate, for instance, your responsibility to put that fire out. from 'The Chronicles of St. Denis' 12th century Artist unknown {{PD}}

Don’t abdicate, for instance, your responsibility to put that fire out. from ‘The Chronicles of St. Denis’ 12th century Artist unknown {{PD}}

From ‘Attachments—Asking Why’, an article on relationships in the current ECLIPSE:

We’ve talked about Ceres’ sex-deadening energy specifically when it contacts the Mars, chart ruler, or Sun or Sun ruler of a male from a female’s chart, or within a same sex interaction in either person’s chart to the other’s, but Ceres can bring her overwhelming Earth Mama or directly maternal vibe by moving aspect, and so temporarily put a damper on drives, unless the individuals can relate to an elemental form of sexuality—if the involved individuals are too civilized, too strongly identify caring with mothering, or are too frightened of Nature and natural behaviors (these make some people feel out-of-control), then a Ceres transit can really gum things up, the worst part being that one might feel the change is permanent, rather than transitory.

Just a Little Lunar Essence for 30 August: the Moon enters Scorpio at 1:53 AM Pacific time of the 30th. 1 PM PDT the Moon trines Neptune. We are open to deep feeling, inspiration, and creative change–whatever moves you at this point is likely to be very positive–unless you let yourself be mislead. Vet your ideas by imagining potential outcomes; if they’re all good, you’ve got a green light. 3 PM PDT the Moon conjuncts Ceres and trines Earth. We connect with our power by connecting, literally, with the earth. Garden, work with clay, walk outside barefoot, swim in a natural body of water, plant something–it will bring power, balance, and peace.

31 August relationships may support us, and our money and/ or talent supports our skills, but only if we refuse to dwell on our wounds or to think like losers! At this time the world really is ours to make of it what we will; don’t abdicate your immense power to declare your territory as your own in favor of playing victim or out of a mistaken belief that it’s egotistical to declare yourself—there’s nothing modest or virtuous about pretending to be weaker or more confused than we actually are. (Perfecting today: Venus semi-square Pallas, Mercury contra-parallel Chiron and semi-square Vesta, Earth trine Ceres)

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Comparison of Knox and Kercher Natal Charts from October 2013 ECLIPSE

01 Saturday Feb 2014

Posted by in Aspect Delineation, Consciousness Explored, Crime, Current Affairs, Current Events, relationship astrology

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Knox-Kercher Natal ComparisonThis is a re-print of an article that appeared exclusively in ECLIPSE last October; it may be of interest to those following Knox’s case now.

The Crying Game: the Amanda Knox Re-Trial The phrase ‘murder will out’ has two meanings: in the first it implies that a murder will always become a public event, and the second is the more general idea that secret or hidden crimes will not remain secret forever. The phrase apparently appears in the English language as far back as the work of Chaucer, and it carries an old superstitious implication, as well: that if the murderer comes near the corpse of the murdered, the corpse will begin to bleed once again. How convenient if this were true! But alas, all we have is the court system, and all we can do is inspect, again and again if need be, the evidence.

The Amanda Knox murder re-trial is in the news once more; a new appeal. brought by the prosecution, began in Perugia, Italy, on 30 September. I thought it might be appropriate to look at the victim, Meredith Kercher, in relation to Knox, via the natal charts. Up to now I’d only looked at Amanda’s natal horoscope and transits at the time of the murder, hoping for some idea if she was really involved–now I think an examination of the relationship between the two women at an elemental level is in order, if only to shed some light on what kind of interaction may have laid the basis for the death of one, which so thoroughly affected the life of the other.

I’ve put Amanda’s chart on the inside as she has a reliable birth time and so angles (9 July 1987 2:47 AM PDT Seattle Washington USA), while we have no birth time for Meredith (28 December 1985 ntk Southwark United Kingdom). The first thing that grabs my attention is the way M’s Chiron is conjunct A’s Ascendant=this may have felt to A like M ‘played the wounded one’ in relation to A’s attempts to ‘meet the world’ (one of the functions of the Ascendant); M’s Chiron is also semi-square A’s Sun, this suggesting both an interaction that may have felt like a minor affront to A’s Soul and identity, as well as M feeling to A like someone who carried the continual threat of injury–and this threatened injury likely echoed injuries A herself saw as her own (both natal Chirons fall in A’s 1st). Strangely, sometimes when we encounter someone who carries the same wounds we do we feel almost offended, as if something that is ours has been overrun and claimed by an interloper (and this attitude likely shows an over-identification with the wound, so that we are possessive of it). M’s Pallas is conjunct A’s Vesta and opposed A’s Ceres, and sextile A’s Jupiter=this suggests M took an ‘I know better than you’ stance of superior wisdom (consciously or not), especially regarding both education and social matters, that violated A’s highest values; this may have felt to A like M took a disparaging view of the attitudes most important to A–and if A was running any kind of ‘social game’ (which I am convinced is an integral part of her personality), then this could’ve felt highly invasive, even as if M were challenging her ‘power’ as a woman at an elemental level.

Meredith’s Capricorn Sun lands exactly on Amanda’s Neptune (M sought solid, real-world contact at a Soul level, but found she received only A’s projections about herself and what she has to give the world–Neptune rules A’s 11th–so that M may have felt continually frustrated and/ or bamboozled!) Further, that places M’s Earth at the midpoint of A’s Venus-Mercury in Cancer (and these of course opposed M’s Sun)=M may have looked for A’s ‘message’ of warmth and caring to be reflected in material matters–and though M probably continued to seek that message with the Sun’s energy and through interaction, she may have felt perpetually mislead or that A came up short. And with M’s Moon undoubtedly in Cancer, she may have been open to that message and highly vulnerable to those prone to withhold those qualities, and so repeatedly disappointed.

This also places M’s Earth as part of A’s Water Grand Trine, consisting of A’s Pluto, Juno, and Merc-Venus, and also sites M’s Sun-Earth axis square A’s Nodes. The feeling for A may have been that M was trying to draw off A’s personal power by making material demands, and certainly, with the Nodes involved, M’s very presence may have felt life-altering to A–and with M’s Earth trine A’s Pluto, the desire to destroy M’s material circumstances, or to see them as an outlet for rage, could’ve been second nature to A.

Meredith’s Ceres, Vesta, and Jupiter all hook in to Amanda’s Sun-Earth axis, and all three challenge the personal power, material security, and the social role of the younger girl (Amanda)–not the easiest subjects to handle in personal relationship during the college years. M’s Mercury also aspects this axis, suggesting that what she thought of Amanda as a person she was quick to communicate–and with that Merc conjunct A’s Saturn, those communications may have felt extraordinarily judgmental, and perhaps spurred the natural desire on A’s part to suppress both M’s words and thoughts.

And a tidbit for past life proponents: Meredith’s Venus is quincunx Amanda’s Mars (and A’s Sun potentially conjuncts M’s Moon), suggesting a relationship (with M the female and A the male) where one or the other had to adjust or sacrifice in some way (the quincunx), in what was at least potentially a sexual relationship (or, also likely, a relationship where A, as the male, held all the power)–which may be its own ‘pre-echo’ (see a later article in this issue) of this current life, as sexual games have been cited as the circumstance leading into Meredith’s murder, and such a need to once again exert her power could’ve played on Amanda’s perceptions, leading her to such an extreme response. But, considering these two young women have opposing Venus placements, we may just be looking at an outright contest, female against female, which can certainly be just as serious.

With M’s Pluto-South Node-Mars conjunct A’s Pluto, sextile A’s Neptune and trine A’s Venus-Merc, Meredith may have had a strong urge to destroy Amanda, just as Amanda seemed to have natural urges to aggress against Meredith. On Meredith’s side, the feeling may have been that she wanted to knock Knox off the ‘image throne’ she spun around herself with the view of an older, wiser woman–and Amanda was having none of it, feeling her personal power threatened and her Neptunian image seen through. When I look at the contacts between the two charts, I see a contentious relationship where each side was aggressive in its own way, where Meredith felt what she saw as her superior knowledge and wisdom should be appreciated, and where Amanda not only resented the judgments but felt threatened by Meredith’s attempts to see through the Neptunian fog–and exposure is just about the worst thing you can do to someone like Knox.

Am I saying Meredith brought on her own murder? Absolutely not. What I am saying is that what happens between two people in some climactic moment doesn’t just spring from the ether fully formed–instead it lurches forward from the primordial interaction of two beings, and finds its origins in those energies that are irreconcilable to each other, that will clash, and clash, until they reach the release offered by separation, no matter how achieved

 

Just a Little Astro Essence on Venus in the Natal Chart

10 Tuesday Jul 2012

Posted by in astrology, Consciousness Explored, ECLIPSE magazine, Natal Delineation, relationship astrology, Venus

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‘A Breezy Day’ CC Curran 1887 {{PD-Art}}

Venus, of course, makes her presence felt by House at least twice in the natal chart, once in her rulership of Taurus, and once with Libra. These two signs are naturally quincunx each other, and this describes the way we quite typically see relationship matters (Libra) as incompatible with material ones (Taurus). We tend to believe that the lowest form of relationship in which we can engage is one where we receive a material benefit; we call this person a ‘prostitute’ or label them ‘kept’ and act as if this (a money for  action or energy exchange, and we condemn this in spite of the fact that a job has the same general parameters) is in itself a moral failing. Our natural uneasiness in mixing or equating the two must be tempered by an awareness that living in mutually beneficial material situations is really what we must do, not just for survival but in order to build civilization. We tend to see a relationship that involves love as more noble than one that provides something we need–and yet we mix these things, love and material need, all the time, particularly when we are in partnership–and perhaps that is one of the underlying reasons the mate relationship is so fraught with emotional landmines: we hold ourselves and our loved ones to impossibly high standards, demanding ‘pure’ love be given and received, and yet the very fabric of day-to-day requires an interdependence that, if we recognize any facet of it as a cold, material exchange, may de-value our relationship in our own eyes.

Taken from ‘Your Money-tude’ in the current issue of ECLIPSE; to see this article or to get the daily forecast (planetary aspects and those of Sedna, Chiron, Vesta, Ceres, Juno, Pallas, and Zeus, as well as most Lunar aspects, too) delivered to your email every Thursday, subscribe!

Conscious Relationship

27 Wednesday Jun 2012

Posted by in astrology, future events in the sky, relationship astrology, Venus

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Some people give up relationships altogether, and get a cat. Gwen John c1922 {{PD-Art}}

This is a re-print from this blog, 2009–if you’d like the forecast in all its glorious detail, sign up here:

No one is entirely conscious within a relationship; there is always something about ourselves or the other person that we’re willing to ignore, look away from, tacitly accept, or pretend we don’t know. This is part of civilization, an agreement not to read each other’s minds, to embrace the pretense that we can’t know the other person immediately. I think I was first introduced to this concept in Spiritual Midwifery by Ina May Gaskin (during my brief turn as a midwife), and ever since first reading of it I’ve observed human interaction with that in mind: if we want to, we can see the other person whole, for precisely who they are, at any time.

Now, it’s not just the rules of civilization that facilitate the creation of such boundaries; our own psyches need particular experiences, we might call them lessons or interactions or a deepening of our understanding of human nature or of ourselves, and this leads us to ignore what we could know, to put ourselves into interactions that may be, on the surface, damaging, or cause our victimization, or that are some kind of relationship ‘wrong turn,’ at least when seen from the finite, earthly, want to get from point a to point b as quickly as possible, perspective. This is why we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves when we make, despite our best efforts, what we judge to be a misstep; even the less than perfect experience, relationship, event offers something that shapes us, or that gives us an opportunity to respond differently than we may have in the past, to grow (and it very often offers both).

So, we might want to know which times are best for getting the clearest view possible of our relationships. The upcoming Venus retrograde period will be a prime time, at least in terms of getting an alternative view of relationships, love, and assets as they figure in your life, and this is particularly so if the retrograde occurs in your 5th, 7th, or 11th–this focuses the spotlight on those significant relationships represented by the Houses, with activity in the 8th emphasizing the significant other or a partnership in terms of what’s being shared, while retrograde occurring in the 1st, 2nd, or 12th makes your own internal workings most prominent. Colleagues, teachers, bosses, other authorities, and those with whom you must work get a once over when Venus retros in your 6th, 9th, and 10th, and family relationships are at the forefront with retro in the 4th, and specifically relationships with siblings and neighbors (or those around whom you grew up) are important with the retro in the 3rd.

Other transits that may facilitate clarity include Saturn, which brings reality home to roost, the Sun, which shines a bright light on whatever it touches, and the Moon, which offers fleeting illumination that is at once more subtle or gentle in tone than the Sun’s, but also carries a tinge of the emotional reality, which may or may not aid perceptions. These planets and lights in contact by Solar Arc and Secondary Progression bring the same opportunities but over a much longer term.